Last night. I dreamt I was in a house with Mike. It was in a small town, like a bedroom community. His parents were wondering what was keeping him with me, why he couldn't move on. This has been happening in other dreams with him; it felt like my boyfriend before him, this connection to him that isn't happy but doesn't break.

We take a trip with each other, as if something will happen on that trip to jog our minds into realizing we love each other. We embark. Nothing changes, except that now we're on a trip. But no emotions change.

It's Sunday morning, and I decide we should go to church. The one we go to is connected to a college, feels like Northwestern. It's more education-based than spirit based.

Brian is inside. His wife and daughter's are not, it's like they couldn't make it. Brian's in there sitting next to a few others of our family.

I go to sit next to them. I really want to talk to Brian, but we are in church and it's not allowed. He is dirty, like he'd been working with plants and came over without showering.

I don't feel like a part of the family. I try, but I just don't feel a part. I don't feel Mike and I should continue trying to hang out anymore either. I feel OK with both of these situations. It makes me a little sad, but overall I feel free.